Last week, Conner played in the school band/orchestra concert. As part of the performance, he participated in a trombone quartet. They sounded great. And if I may be so bold (bias), it was the best performance of the evening. They rocked the HOUSE!It's a lot of fun to see Conner play the trombone and do so well at it. And it's even more fun (for me) because I also played the trombone in middle school and high school. In fact, Conner plays the same trombone I played during my band days. However, he's already much better at it than I ever was.
But why the trombone? Well, like most life-altering decisions, there's a story behind that.
One early summer morning before I entered the 6th grade, I found myself in the middle school band room. I was there to discuss with my future band director (Ms. Poulson), which instrument would best showcase my budding musical talents during the upcoming school year. It was a decision I didn't need to spend much time thinking about. Formidable bands the likes of "Men at Work," "Duran Duran," and "Hall & Oates" had made the saxophone solo an indispensable part of all awesome songs in the early 1980s, and therefore, my decision was an easy one.
"I'll be playing the saxophone," I remember saying.
In my mind's eye, I could already see myself—friends gathered around me, unable to contain their envious excitement as I belted out sax-solo after blistering sax-solo for their astonished enjoyment.
A comment from my band director jolted me from my blissful yet humble daydream—"A muscular, strapping young man like yourself shouldn't be playing a wimpy instrument like the saxophone—no, a young man with your build would be much better suited to an instrument like the manly trombone, don't you think?"
At this point, here's what I should have been thinking, "That manipulative little band director must take me for a FOOL!—she's obviously trying to steer me to a lesser instrument because she already has too many people who want to play the coolest instrument of all time...well, you underestimate me, Ms. Poulson—I would NEVER fall for such blatantly transparent and downright shifty tactics."
But no. I wasn't thinking any of those things. What I was actually thinking was, "She's pretty observant. I AM a muscular and strapping young man, aren't I?"
And that is how I came to play the trombone throughout my teenage years. And since Conner inherited my old instrument, I'm sure he's actually quite pleased that his ol' dad was so gullible as a youth. You don't hear too many "awesome" saxophone solos anymore, do you? Also, I can tell you (on good authority) that trombones make way better spit-wad shooters than saxophones. I rest my case.
My apologies to my saxophone playing dad and brother.
4 comments:
Do I detect that you have really "thrown down the gauntlet"? Nothing is more sexy or saxy than the sax, and the mellow tones are far superior and softer than the trombone. You need to catch some Lawrence Welk shows and compare the saxiness and manliness of the saxaphone vs the trombone. Further more "spitwads are sooooo gross". I rest my case.
By the way Conner you are really looking good and I'll bet you had great time in your performance.
Dad
You are too funny! Way to go Conner!
What a manly man :)! Saxophones are awesome, but trombones can hold their own. In addition to being a great spit wad shooter, I bet you could also tap that cute girl in the front row on the shoulder with the end of your trombone and she wouldn't even know where it came from :)!
To me it doesn't matter which instrument generates the coolest appearance, even though Conner looks way cool playing the trombone - I just enjoy reading Ryan's diatribes of life's experiences. You never cease to entertain us with your creativity. Keep writing.
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